


Crazy Is As Crazy Does

by Ultra



Category: Leverage, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Crazy, Darcy Lewis's Taser, Dating, Dinner, Double Dating, Embarrassment, F/M, Gen, Hilarity Ensues, Laughter, Old Friends, Restaurants, Tasers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-11
Updated: 2013-03-11
Packaged: 2018-08-08 04:19:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7743142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ultra/pseuds/Ultra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When old friends Eliot Spencer and Clint Barton meet up for dinner, they thought bringing their girlfriends along would be a fun idea... yeah, right!</p>
<p>(originally written for caitriona_3, based on the prompts: Eliot/Parker, Clint/Darcy, Parker & Darcy - ‘Is crazy contagious?’)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crazy Is As Crazy Does

Eliot put his hand over his face and wished he was anywhere but here right now. He had thought it’d be cool to see his old buddy Clint again after so many years, and when Parker decided to come along, he thought that’d be fine. She was better in public places and around strangers now than she had been when they first started dating. Eliot could trust her to be reasonably behaved in a restaurant, he was sure. Of course, he hadn’t realised that the combination of Parker and Clint’s own girlfriend, Darcy, would be so problematic.

The two young women sat beside each other at the table were laughing so hard they could barely breathe. If the people three blocks over couldn’t hear them, Eliot would be very much surprised. God only knew what they found so funny. They’d been whispering and giggling almost from the get go. Clint found it amusing enough apparently, but Eliot was mortified.

“Oh my God!” Darcy roared. “And you just dropped the guy? In the court room?”

“Uh-huh,” Parker gasped in air but could barely stop laughing long enough. “And all the time, he thought I was dead!”

Another raucous bout of giggling made Eliot wince and he smiled an apology at the passing waiter who nearly overturned a tray of desserts at the shock of the sound. So much for thinking Parker was twenty pounds of crazy, he’d had no idea it was possible to have two such people become exponentially more than the sum of their parts like this.

“So... this is Parker, huh?” said Clint, looking sideways at Eliot. “She’s fun.”

“Not as fun as Darcy,” his old buddy replied with a look. “The two of them together is just...”

“Fun,” the guys said in chorus, sarcastic smirks on both their lips.

“Would you girls knock it off for five minutes,” the hitter hissed across the table then, a little tired of being glared at for the noise, and kind of just wanting to have a reasonable conversation for a while.

“Oooh, sorry, Dad,” Darcy smiled saucily, pretending to zip her mouth closed.

That only made Parker want to giggle all the more, but she made an effort not to. Eliot was getting mad, and that wasn’t so much of the good. He had been looking forward to tonight, after all, and she didn’t want to spoil it for him. It was just that Parker didn’t have all that many friends, and those she did have didn’t really get her. Darcy liked tasers and being snarky. She was smart and funny, and she was dating a hero-type. It was kind of crazy how much Parker had in common with this other girl, but she liked it.

“It’s not like either of you are very talky,” she said then, staring cross the table at Eliot, folding her arms across her chest the way he did, the way he was right now in fact. “For guys who haven’t seen each other in eight years, you don’t have much to say.”

“Parker has a point,” Darcy agreed with a nod as she sipped her water. “All I’ve heard for a week is how awesome and cool Eliot Spencer is, how much you wanted to see him again,” she reminded Clint. “Got news for you, Arrow Boy, you’ve said an average six words since we hit the restaurant.”

“Well, I was waiting for you and Parker to break for air, sweetheart,” he replied with as much overly-faked affection as she used.

“If they’re not nicer to us...” said Parker in a deliberately loud whisper as she leaned into Darcy’s side, “we should tase them.”

That brought on another guffaw of laughter from her friend, though she did her best to stifle in with her hand and remaining willpower. Having both Clint and Eliot glaring at her wasn’t helping. They were so funny when they were mad!

“Ooh, y’know, with everything all extra dangerous now Clint is... on that team,” Darcy emphasised just so. “I so wanna get a X3 HD, but he’s all like ‘I’m here to protect you, sweetheart,” she over-did the fake deep manly voice and her boyfriend immediately took offence - not that Darcy noticed.

“Oh my God, I want one of those!” Parker enthused. “Eliot won’t even let me have a C2,” she pouted, glancing the hitter’s way. “Apparently ‘twenty pounds of crazy doesn’t need added electro-shock capabilities’,” she complained, putting on the same kind of fake voice her friend had used.

Another round of overly loud laughter meant Clint had to slip the fuming maitre d’ twenty bucks just to keep their table. Other patrons of the restaurant were complaining, he knew, but he hoped the cash would allow him and Eliot time to get the girls down to a dull roar.

“Seriously?” Eliot growled. “You think you two might wanna put a lid on it now?”

To their credit, Parker and Darcy both tried to calm down, but it didn’t come easy. They excused themselves to go to the bathroom then, promising to be better behaved when they returned. Neither of their boyfriends entirely believed that was going to happen.

“Y’know, I love her to death,” Clint sighed. “But sometimes I just wanna tape Darcy’s mouth shut for a half hour so I can hear myself think.”

“Amen, brother,” Eliot agreed, offering a high-five/handshake to his buddy.

Even at this range they heard another explosion of laughter from the girls just before they cleared the door to the bathroom. Eliot winced and sunk down a little further in his seat, noticing Clint was doing the same.

“Seriously, man. You think crazy is contagious?”


End file.
